Why I am glad my baby did not sleep

isla-sleep

My firstborn started school in September.

I am now a proper grown-up parent with a schoolchild. I have  to get everyone up, dressed and somewhere on time, in clean uncreased clothes, every morning. There will soon be homework, phonics, forms and parents evenings.

I have to kiss my four-year-old daughter goodbye FIVE days a week, and send her off to face new challenges and situations, without me. Continue reading

How to pick up women when you have babies

sleep deprived mum friendsMotherhood can be lonely, but if you are sleep-deprived, it is a bit of a Catch 22.

You crave adult company but at the same time you are too bloody tired for adult company.

Some days talking to anyone over the age of two seems like way too much effort. But on other days you would quite like a moan, a laugh and a chat (ideally over wine) with someone who gets it.

But it is hard to make friends when you are always exhausted. It becomes difficult just to hold a conversation. It impairs your mental filter, tramples over your inhibitions and makes it hard to concentrate on what is being said.

So unfortunately, sleep-deprived parents are not much of a catch but fear not – there is hope for the perfect ‘Mumance’.  Continue reading

Inside the mind of a sleep-deprived parent (at 4am)

4AMHaving a baby that will NOT go to sleep or stay asleep is hard work.

They don’t sleep, so you don’t sleep and, before you know it, your house is a mess, you look a mess and your mind is fast becoming a mess.

Especially at bloody 4am.  When you have been up all night. Continue reading

The Baby Who Did NOT Want To Fall Asleep

Best selling book The Rabbit Who Wants To Fall Asleep promises to get children to sleep in MINUTES… After reading it to my children I was inspired to write my own bed time story for the little ones who do NOT want to fall asleep…

bedtime story

 

ONCE upon a time there was a baby girl who did not want to fall asleep.

She would much rather stay up all night having fun, playing and laughing than to …fall asleep (shush now darling, let mummy read the nice story).

Her tired parents would embark on the same routine at the same time every single night in order to get her to fall asleep (stop hitting me in the face). Continue reading

How to get a toddler to go the f**k to sleep

Go the f**k to sleepDoes your toddler love bedtime?  Mine does.  As long as I am not trying to actually get her to sleep.

Here are her top five Sleep Avoidance tactics:

-She will always want the one cuddly toy that I can’t find.

-She takes take twice as long to go to sleep whenever I have plans (normally to drink wine in my pjyamas). Continue reading

You have been doing bedtime wrong your WHOLE life

bedtime-1Do you hate bedtime? Does it consistently make you miserable? Do you routinely spend most of the night in a dark room with a baby?

Have you been consistently routining your arse off since day ONE, yet your baby STILL won’t sleep?

Then this seven-step method is for you. Continue reading

The 10 stages of getting a baby to go the f**k to sleep

ARE you looking for a way to get your baby to go to sleep and stay asleep when they do not want to be asleep?

You probably won’t find one.

At worst, they will stay awake all night. At best, you may be able to get them to stay in bed long enough for you to enjoy (neck) a glass of wine. Continue reading

SURVIVOR STORY: How My Toddler Changed My Life!

convosIn our latest Survivor story the Internet’s most famous father-of-two Matthew Clarke tells us how parenthood turned him into a You Tube sensation!

The 34-year-old creator of Convos With My 2-Year-Old was inspired to turn his hilarious conversations with his toddler into a mini-series with a twist – they are re-enacted by himself and a fully-grown man…. Continue reading

SURVIVOR STORY: How I Turned A Year Of Sleep Deprivation Into A Business

imagesOur latest sleep thief survivor is formerly exhausted mother-of-two Nicole Johnson.

She talks about how her experience of parenthood inspired her to set up her business The Baby Sleep Site and why she has made it her mission to help other tired parents ‘find their child’s sleep’.
Continue reading